There is something about your site that keeps me cumming back and back again. I’ve found something here which is better than viewing pictures of cock (which is what I was searching for when I came here).  It is about finding that there there are other people like me.  A community, A community of men like me. Thanks. I have always been in str8 relationships but had the occasional sticky moment with guys. Also, COCK fills my fantasy life. I had a brief relationship with a married couple and was able to make love with the guy and taste his spunk. I was never properly fucked by him (just cockhead into ring, no deeper) and I never fucked him.  I think of him often and wish we had taken the plunge. I wrote the following a while ago: I went with a friend to see a few of the films in the 2004 London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival. They had an effect on me. I laughed and I got aroused and I felt sad and I felt anxiety. There I was in the theatre and I was surrounded by mostly guys and most I knew would be interested in the on-screen sex in more than just an intellectually detached way.  Like me.  So there was also a feeling of belonging too. Certainly, we laughed together as a man. I realised something about myself. I admitted something to myself. I prefer men.  It’s not that I don’t like women, but I am attracted by men first, women second. Fact.  Period. It’s not like “Oh gosh, I never knew”, more about recognising and owning myself, my behaviour, my interests. It’s about desire and possibility and heartbreak, about hope and fear, about self-esteem and self-acceptance. I don’t feel gay, don’t identify with “gay”, don’t want to be associated with “gay”, yet if I prefer my own sex for sex, what choices do I have? Love the site – long may you prosper.

So you have a problem with the word ”gay”, but you like to have sex with men? …. normally this is where the accusations of hypocrisy and internalized homophobia, and other vapid comments would start assaulting you. But brother, I know exactly how you feel.

”Gay” is a bit of a tainted word, isn’t it? It stems from the words happy/carefree, and coined from the ”dandy” culture of early 20th century, basically demasculated, effeminate rich men who were unable to hide their mannerisms in a world where homosexuality was unacceptable, and even illegal. It was a means to an end – survival.

There is just one problem. Not all men who are attracted to other men are effeminate. We have masculine minds, and we walk this world, often with a furrowed brow. Hardly qualifies as ”carefree”. But nontheless people judge us. Being a Man today is one of the most unfashionable things you can be. Women will ridicule you, ”gays” will call you out, lesser men will feel threatened by you.

Then we seek companionship and warmth with other men. Beautiful, complex, everyday heroes. We touch each other, smell each other, taste each other, and in that moment no place on his body is taboo. The freedom of kissing, licking, sucking, caressing any part of his body without shame or second thought is one of the most liberating feelings you can achieve. You pleasure each other like only two people with the same body can.

And they wanna reduce this to ”gay”?? Skipping down the street like a little girl with a lollipop and a hapless grin on your face?

No. It’s time for a new term. After all, we are a verbal species, so labels are inevitable.

I like to use the term ”androsexual”, stemming from ”andros”, ”man”. It simply means ”sexually attracted to men”.”, without any cultural connotations whatsoever. Therefore it doesn’t limit you.

Peace, and manhugs.

Ben

26 thoughts on “A Community?

  1. I love this site I want to know more, am homosexual filmmaker who wrote and acted in the film called fall away, and I really do believe that homosexuality has nothing to do with gay culture, I hope that’s OK to say and it was one of the reasons I wrote the film.

    1. Hello Grant, welcome to the HaPenis project. Congratulations on Fall Away. I’ve just watched the trailer on Youtube; ||Look amazing. Well Done!

    2. Totally. It’s confused with a tribal dichotomy; either- or. Pick a side. There are plenty of men and always have been, who thrive in the “both” world. Hairy chested, physical enjoyment of men together; no big deal. And not necessarily exclusive to man-sex. Even the word bisexual doesn’t really capture the flexibility that many men enjoy are or are capable of and benefit from emotionally and physically.

  2. Sex with another men is far more relaxing and corresponds more to what we are looking for to get satisfied
    Is not just a matter of ejaculation it is a deeper satisfaction as u can really act in sex as a men show your inner feelings ;
    with a women u always have to be careful as she might have unexpected reaction and spoil the moment ..
    i love this site that i follow since 1 year

    reading here different comments made me think a lot and grow ..i feel my personaly more fitted in my mind and manhood , i regret i did not discover that 30 years ago !

  3. I describe myself as ManSexual. Men do it for me, simple uncomplicated rugged kind athletic men. I was gay before but it never sat right with me. Manliness does it for me.

  4. So you have a problem with the word ”gay”, but you like to have sex with men? …. normally this is where the accusations of hypocricy and internalized homophobia, and other vapid comments would start assaulting you.

    But brother, I know exactly how you feel.
    ”Gay” is a bit of a tainted word, isn’t it? It stems from the words happy/carefree, and coined from the ”dandy” culture of early 20th century, basically demasculated, effeminate rich men who were unable to hide their mannerisms in a world where homosexuality was unacceptable, and even illegal. It was a means to an end – survival.

    There is just one problem. Not all men who are attracted to other men are effeminate. We have masculine minds, and we walk this world, often with a furrowed brow. Hardly qualifies as ”carefree”. But nontheless people judge us. Being a Man today is one of the most unfashionable things you can be. Women will ridicule you, ”gays” will call you out, lesser men will feel threatened by you.

    Then we seek companionship and warmth with other men. Beautiful, complex, everyday heroes. We touch each other, smell each other, taste each other, and in that moment no place on his body is taboo. The freedom of kissing, licking, sucking, caressing any part of his body without shame or second thought is one of the most liberating feelings you can achieve. You pleasure each other like only two people with the same body can.

    And they wanna reduce this to ”gay”?? Skipping down the street like a little girl with a lollipop and a hapless grin on your face?

    No. It’s time for a new term. After all, we are a verbal species, so labels are inevitable.

    I like to use the term ”androsexual”, stemming from ”andros”, ”man”. It simply means ”sexually attracted to men”.”, without any cultural connotations whatsoever. Therefore it doesn’t limit you.

    Peace, and manhugs.

    1. I think that «sexual flexibility» is the most correct word does not involves which sex the involved ones are !!
      Some people attracts u so u feel to know the other better and maybe more
      Why to define this acting according who is the target gay or str8 action ? Stop labelling ..
      At love making we all use the same body parts , men are more lucky ( « as usual » we can fuck and be fucked women only be penetrated unless they use a sex toy SOME MEN ARE SO LUCKY THAT CAN FUCK OR SUCK THEMSELVES

  5. Hi Kip, thanks for your words.
    I live in Chile and would like to keep in touch.

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