Having had prostate surgery and RT, it took me years to fully recover my self confidence in sex. Thanks in part to this site where I have an endless assortment of pics to enhance my imagination for a good masturbation session almost daily, I have also found a friend. He is the most compassionate man I have known, patient, caring, loving. Our love making is beyond any prior experience I had. We just let the time go by, play, hug, kiss. And fuck each other with so much tenderness. It is amazing. What have I learnt? We men are enlightened creatures who need another man to fully express ourselves. It has nothing to do with being bi, married, gay or whatever other label you want to hang to yourself. Man to man relationships open a door to a bigger scape, an ample space of wisdom and ecstatic communion with ourselves. It allows us to be gentle, connects us with a forgotten being inside of us, a child or maybe an old man full of wisdom. At 58, I had never been so happy and felt so full of love. Thanks for this site.

Andres

“We men are enlightened creatures who need another man to fully express ourselves.”

“We men are enlightened creatures who need another man to fully express ourselves.” –

no it’s not a mistake, I posted it twice because the truth of that statement stands above just about all GAY thinking – we need another man to make us feel and know who and what we really are! Enlightened of not! There are so many men who never approach another man because they have been taught that: man & man ~ WRONG! it can only be man and woman. Do not deny yourself the companionship of another man. Seek the one who holds YOU in great regard, seek the one who “completes” you and your beautiful GAY self. Some of we GAY MEN will fail in our search for our “completion of our self.” There will always be some who fail to connect with their “man” for a variety of reasons. Perhaps for them it will always be a search and never a completion. Please, try, try, try. Make your life what it is supposed to be ~ loving another man!

Richard Anthony

9 thoughts on “My Self Confidence

  1. I’ve just found your site. I had a Radical Robotic Prostatectomy 16 months ago after a prostate cancer diagnosis. I wasn’t informed that I could never have ANY testosterone or similar product for the rest of my life as the cancer would manifest somewhere else. I also lost 3-1/2″ of penis length and have not been able to get aroused AT ALL unless I use the penile injections. If they work, I still feel nothing but severe pain, especially at the site of a former peyronies injury. I eventually have to take meds to get things to go down to prevent further damage. There is of course no semen or precum as everything is disconnected. I started puberty well before the norm and was fully developed by age 9. I learned what to do quickly to make the best use of my gift with school friends in the locker room. Some are now gay, others not. My wife of over 35 years doesn’t understand my discouragement or depression. I can’t even get a “chub” regardless of what I see or do. I’m only 61. Is it all over for me? How do you connect with people to get help with male bonding especially in the US?

    1. Wow man…! What an extreme experience.
      I am married too and it this is a hard burden for our wives. Doctors don’t have the slightest idea of the real consequences for our affective lives this surgery may cause.
      But our sex and affective lives, I have discovered, are not over yet.
      I would gladly keep in touch with you. I just don’t know how we can get our emails.

  2. I am so happy for you! Congratulations! I too had prostate surgery, but have not been able to get my confidence back. I’m working on it!

    1. Hi there,
      Try, try, try… our bodies need time, especially because prostate surgery affects our minds, self esteem and self image. It is a hard trail, for sure. But you will surely make it.
      So many times I see myself as “not delivering” in bed until my friend once told me “you are the most passionate man I’ve ever known”. Am I? Really??
      And the answer is yes. Because it is self esteem that creates the magic. It is when we embrace ourselves, with all we have and don’t have.
      And in this deep intimacy with myself, I have found my true masculinity, beyond size and girth and more related with compassion, love and connection. And also erection, that I have been fortunate enough to regain after 5 years after surgery.

      1. Andres,

        I wish I was your trusted friend. As Seb would say, yours are very wise words. Men…

        Thanks mate, I believe you might be a straight married man also, makes your wisdom even more special.

        Big hugs man,
        S

  3. “We men are enlightened creatures who need another man to fully express ourselves.”
    “We men are enlightened creatures who need another man to fully express ourselves.” – no it’s not a mistake, I posted it twice because the truth of that statement stands above just about all GAY thinking – we need another man to make us feel and know who and what we really are! Enlightened of not! There are so many men who never approach another man because they have been taught that: man & man ~ WRONG! it can only be man and woman. Do not deny yourself the companionship of another man. Seek the one who holds YOU in great regard, seek the one who “completes” you and your beautiful GAY self. Some of we GAY MEN will fail in our search for our “completion of our self.” There will always be some who fail to connect with their “man” for a variety of reasons. Perhaps for them it will always be a search and never a completion. Please, try, try, try. Make your life what it is supposed to be ~ loving another man!

  4. So true about men needing another man to connect with no matter straight, gay or bi etc because no matter what anyone says….men know exactly what men need – sexually that is – we know what each other want, we know how we want it, how many times we need it, we know exactly where to rub or grip each others cock, we now how to suck each others cocks like how hard or slow, how to wank our cocks, how rough or soft, how we like to kiss – because I know most straight men would rather kiss quite rough but can’t kiss too rough when with a woman because we would probably give her stubble rash whereas with a man it’s so hot kissing rough and hard and same with sucking cock most women like to think they are good but no woman can do it quite like a man can we just have the natural instinct to do it exactly right and straight men who have ever wondered what it would be like wouldn’t be disappointed and would be thinking why they haven’t tried it before! Doesn’t mean your instantly gay just because you get another lad to suck or wank you off other than your wife or girlfriend, if anything it makes you more confident and content with your sexuality and all it is is giving yourself what you deserve and getting sucked exactly how you like it because your gf or wife won’t quite satisfy it completely and I believe us men should always get sexual satisfaction where we can and get it of men or women whatever your sexual orientation

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